I've been exactly where you are now, amberlea, and can relate to your feelings of frustration over loved ones emotionally attached to the organization while you've grown more mature and are developing your thinking abilities (see 2 Peter 3:1 "arousing your clear thinking faculties...") and I fully agree with Mick that any thought process involving cutting out any middle-men is putting you on the right track!

That is what has kept me sane, namely first of all working on myself and my own relationship with God - call him whatever you like, imagine him any way you like - and if your own instinctive feelings about something conflict with what the man-made organization says, then stick to your guns and be true to yourself - always.

This is the way to a new world-view - your OWN - which you can shape, develop and create according to your individual character as it grows. It's a lonely path at first; you can't talk about those thoughts and deeper meditations to JWs, but there are others outside, here and elsewhere who know what you're saying, so we're not all alone.