((HUGS))

You know, its been a couple years since I've been to a DC myself but in many ways, I do miss the excitement and the 'togetherness' that it always made me feel. It was a family event that really did bring my family closer together and made us forget the myriad problems we had.

Its totally understandable what you're feeling right now. You're poor head is probably in all sorts of different places. Seeing friends and family but having to sit through 2 days of DC without believing anything they are saying and knowing the real truth...

I know I felt this way a little bit the very last time I went to a meeting, like a fish out of water, a dolphin in the shark cage so to speak. You know the real truth but to avoid all the problems you don't voice them, you have to keep it all inside. This gets very stressful and difficult and takes its toll on you after a while...which is why it probably feels so good to write about it!

I am lucky in a way I suppose, not since I was a young child have I ever been able to visualize myself in the JW "Paradise Earth". It never seemed any more real to me than any other Utopian society written about through history. I know I still have not come to terms with my Grandma's recent passing though. Strange how I can still stow away my grief with the idea of the ressurection hope without fully reasoning through the fact I haven't believed in Paradise for years..... but I digress.

I hope you stay safe and enjoy seeing your friends. Just remember, your mind is your own and the 'spiritual banquet' you're being subjected to is all gonna give you the mental/emotional/spiritual shits, so it's best NOT to digest it on their recommendation

"Some say "Money is the root of all Evil". I would disagree with this statement and offer that rather, the lack of money is the root of all evil" -Mark Twain