Karon,

I am glad that you found this forum. There are so many people here who share the feelings that you are experiencing. I have recently found this place and am glad that I did. I was raised as one of JW's, then I really just faded for a long time, but always thought that it was the truth - until just these past few months. Like you, I don't know what I believe anymore. My foundation has been shaken and feels like it is crumbling...and I don't know where to turn to rebuild it. I have no idea if I believe in God anymore - I *think* I do, but can't be sure. What I have learned is that I am not alone in this experience...and it WILL get better. That is something that I can have faith in.

I am doing my best to take things one day at a time. Some days are better than others, and when I find myself feeling terrified of Armageddon because of something I saw on the news - I come here. I read about other experiences and I've even posted when I just need to vent...and it helps.

This whole experience is just as frightening as it is enlightening - but at some point the enlightenment starts to outweigh the fear. Just know that you are among people who understand what you are going through, you are not alone. For me, this is the comfort that gets me through each day of this bizarre journey.

I'm not sure where you live, but you may want to see if there is a support group. I just started one in my area through Meetup.com and I see that there are many other groups like mine across the country.

Please let me know if I can help you in any way. I do wish you the best.

-Tracie