Karon, I just wish to welcome you to the boards and encourage you to stay with us. Yes, so many of us can relate to your story and feelings of being the round peg in a square hole even after coming out. I know I feel that way. I've always felt like a watcher on the outside looking in on life........I've actually almost gotten used to it but it is lonely at times.

Your husband sounds like a gem and I'm sure you've learned a lot from his research. I have been facinated with the study of what I call the 'evolution of spirituality' throughout history. For me it has helped to make some sense out of how we got to where we are. It does amaze me at times how long a religious tradition or 'thought form' can go on. The paradigm that started in the Middle East pervades the religious ideas of at least 3 major religions to this day; Judaism, Christianity and Islam. When one considers that it began as a means to control desert dwelling tribal peoples in a rather hostile environment it's no wonder that the god they worshipped was also very much on the harsh side. Although I don't ascribe to any religion anymore, I have found some of the Eastern teachings to be wise and also comforting. Tao Te Ching is one........wisdom certainly wasn't the exclusive possesion of Middle Eastern holy men or kings although I find it interesting that in the end Solomon became an apostate. Wise man indeed!

Stay with us here and and hopefully you'll find some needed peace of mind in the shared expressions of others who definitely know the feelings you are going through.

(((Karon)))

Sharon

"I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief"

Gerry Spence