Hi Beth sorry to see you have been feeling down. My wife has said that I was getting obsessed with the witness stuff a few weeks back. Even though I'd been out  a long time, and didn't believe it, the recent stuff I've found has made me realise just how manipulative and dishonest the organisation is. That's left me with a lot of anger; that and the other things that have been happening in my life.

Again, as you say, the more you dig, the more you find; The stories are all so similar and you jsut think that this is so common why don't the witnesses cahnge, why don't they get it. Especially on some forums where they blatantly deny beliefs or practices which are there in black and white in their own literature.

I hear what you are saying about not dragging this process on. A couple of times when I have refered to my own situation, with the purpose of letting someone know that there is another person out there who knows what they are talking about, I also think that 'Woah, I've been out for over 15 years and I'm still affected by it. Is that going to discourage them, thinking this is how long it takes?

But when I talk to my wife, or any other non witnesses; even counsellors, they really do not understand; and a forum like this is just the ticket.

I know your input and experiences on this forum have helped other people; myself included. but you do need to think of yourself as well. Sometimes you can dwell on the past too much, and it is negative; other times it helps to talk about it.

You  do need to have a balance between dealing with the past, and getting on with the Now.

Hope you are feeling better soon.

Jez