Cacky ... don't let the empty threats and nasty tantrums of your mum drag you down. Sometimes in life we have to do things that our parents or other family members may not perhaps agree with or like much ... however if it's for their own good ... as in the case of your mum being placed into a secure environment ... then you've done the right thing and shouldn't feel guilty for it.

I think some (not all) older people get a little miffed as they head towards what will be certain death ... and they lash out at everyone around them without thinking about feelings or hurtfulness. They are getting older, crankier and more determined to take everyone with them. It's quite sad. A friend of mine works with the elderly and she said the majority are just gorgeous ... they are happy to be where they are and make the most of the time they have left ... whereas the minority are cranky, rude, spiteful even ... purely because their youth has vanished and they're out to make sure family and friends know how upset they are. She also said that the elderly get to a stage where the veneers start to peel off and the true natures come shining through because they no longer have to worry about what their families or society in general think of them. I'm old therefore I'm cranky ... if you know what I mean!

I'm probably going to have something or someone bite me in the butt for this next comment ... but ... I personally don't think you should feel obligated to see your mum and nor should you feel guilty for not seeing her. At the end of the day we all grow up and become adults ... we all have the right to choose the life we wish to lead and providing we're not willingly and knowingly hurting someone ... what we choose to do with our day is our business.

I love my mum dearly but at the moment she's driving me nuts. She tells my sister, brother and anyone else within hearing distance that she 'needs' me ... that I'm not there for her ... that I don't understand what she's going through ... yet she won't ring and tell me. I get cross that I have to hear things via other people ... then I sit back ... shake off the emotional blackmail (which is all it is) ... and I take a deep breath. She's my mum ... I love her ... but I don't have to like her when she's playing up! So don't feel bad Cacky ... you're not doing anything wrong at all.

Take a deep breath ... and go make yourself a lovely cup of tea ... or coffee