I was still going through personal hell when I was DF'd. I went because I was still unsure what I believed, and I was told that I should be there. I attended with the help of coke and booze to get through that evening. Randy I would echo what you say above about the elders in my case. They were decent caring men who were caught between caring and the RIGHT things they were taught to do. Happily it was one of the best things that could have happened to me as being disfellowshipped got me away from the constant mind control and I slowly began to think for myself. Now almost Nine years later I look back on that person in wonder. It is like looking back at a stranger, because I wasn't ever truly myself back then.