He seems to like to take the joy from my life.

Sadly that is exactly what he has been taught to do for so long!!  As jw's we always lived 'for the future'......nothing that happened in this world was of any relevance to us because we were always being urged to keep our eyes on the new system smiley: ohwell

I hadn't quite realised just how much this depressive attitude had affected my life until recently.........I suddenly realised that most of my life had been spent 'in waiting'........neither births nor deaths were given the appropriate joy or grief, I lived in a robotic state!!

Your dad has had even more years of this, and sadly by now he probably finds it impossible to live any other way.....everything you related to him is dissected and applied to the jw teachings, don't let us forget just how long he has been waiting for the 'every near' end *sigh*

I know how much this must disturb and hurt you........but all you can do is love him regardless, I am so sorry that your father has never been allowed to just be himself!!

Hugs

Sam xx