Hey Sam, Thank you.
I don't really have a place to talk about this stuff except here. It seems so petty and boring to others, I try not to talk about it. One would have to live with it daily to understand, it just doesn't go away. Writing has been a great way to keep me from thinking about it but I always knew the day would come when I would want to write about everything that happened.
I'm just not sure exactly who I'm writing to. Is it for closure or a final letter to my dying parents? Is it a memoir of my childhood or a tell all of family secrets that will explode like a bomb? How do I even tell a dramatic story that people would want to read? Again, what's the point?

I wasn't even thinking about it until my brother accused me of being full of demons in his "review" of a (thriller) story about a man who's dog was poisoned by an employee that robbed a customer and got caught and then continued to stalk his family:

"I read about two paragraphs and stopped reading. It is filled with darkness. Clearly this man is self-indulgent and unrestrained, possessed and obsessed with selfish delusions of self importance. Again, no judgement, merely reporting an observation as if from a clinical psychologist. Having am understanding of demonology, I further observe that he has no notion that it is not a murderous man that killed his girl, but a murderous spirit, the same murderous spirit that now infects and controls himself as he premeditates the very same behavior. According to the story, it's not okay by him for a murderous spirit to control another man if it means he personally is stolen from, but it's okay for him to take the vengeance dictated to him by the same murderous spirit to behave the exact same way. That is an interesting delusional sociopathic justification. This story has powerful potential to shape thoughts, to even create sympathy and similar unrestrained patterns of selfish delusion in those that read it. In my observation of the dark under belly of Satan's schemes, I'd report that this is an attempt to shape thoughts, which have a nasty habit of forming beliefs, which inevitably become actions. If I allowed myself to be consumed by this murderous spirit and thoughts of the injustices you yourself have perpetrated, I'd be at YOUR door, gun in hand, bro. Realize they are not your own thoughts but the desperate attempts of whimpy demons planting thoughts in an attempt to convince you they are your own thoughts."

How does one even respond to this? Did he just say he would use a gun on me if a voice in his head told him to? WTF!

He sent this "review" to me right before christmas and I didn't even tell my wife, Lynn . She would have been so upset at him. She lost her mom last year so this was our first christmas without both her parents. It just bummed the shit out of me. But It was a good story that got very good reviews. No demons were harmed or conjured during the writing of it. I don't believe in demons, therefore they don't exist.

Locutus: "every time we look back and try to share our successes, we are told that we are evil or damned." I thought when my two brothers got out of the borg, it would be "us against them" in a way. We would at least have some common ground and family solidairity but instead they went looking for MORE truth to use against each other and me to prove our mother (the malignant cancer) wrong and continue in the beloved practice of the silent treatment which gives them power and complete control - at least in their mind. Onward through the fog.....

Andrea syxx, Hi there, long time.
Yes, you are right. I am free. I will write my story some day, but it won't be because my dumbass little brother got me all worked up like this. I'm not ready.

"as if from a clinical psychologist...." Did you catch that? Our mother pulled him out of school in 9th grade back in 1975 because Armageddon was coming! He has no other education, 3 times divorced and hasn't paid taxes in 15 years. I feel kind of sorry for him. Talk about demons; Wait till the IRS catches up to him.

Big......sigh. Thanks for listening. I feel a little better.

Mark