I'm all for the 'what do you want to know' .... or 'where would you like me to begin' comments Sharon.

I consider myself to be highly successful. Not financially or even physically for that matter (I'm getting longer in the tooth these days) ...... however I do believe that my personal freedom is priceless and like you ... it's not something I'll ever relinquish.

Given I left the religion pre-PC days ... I had a theory that seemed to be proven time and time again with the people I knew ... that the majority of jdubs who left would head back within the first two years. Most who went back did so for family reasons and out of fear. They didn't go back because they were super religious and realised the world was too tough for them. It wasn't that they were weak and went back either ... it seemed to depend on how strong they were emotionally and how laid back their family and jdub friends were. As we all know ... it's not easy to walk away to begin with, specially not with the advanced knowledge that we face being shunned by everyone we've grown up with and have hung out with for years. So I understood totally when people I knew back in the earlier days of my leaving said their goodbyes and wandered back to the jdub fold. I didn't envy them but felt sad that they didn't have the faith in themselves that they could conquer the fears and guilt they were programmed with.

The ones who stayed out during those first crucial couple of years ... for the most part are still out.     Some still have problems trying to fit into the world as it really is ... some have overcome the obstacles and are flying high, enjoying life and living it to the full.     I admire those who stay out .... and wish I could hug the ones who go back and tell them it DOES get better in time and the hurt does lessen.   It may not go away entirely ... but it does kind of fade into a slight ache every now and then.

People who we've had in here who have invariably gone back have also gone back for family and friend reasons rather than for the religious belief itself. They may read my comment and say I'm making massive assumptions ...... but when you read the various stories made by our fellow members, the main thread is the loss, the hurt and the frustration at having loving family members and friends turn their backs because of religious bigotry. Which is what the whole shunning thing is.

I'm successful because I live life my way. Not selfishly nor materialistically as the jdub faithful are led to believe happens to us all when we leave or are kicked out.   I'm not running around lying, cheating or stealing. I'm not in the gutter on the bones of my arse. I'm not living in a sexual deviant lifestyle driven along by drugs or alcohol. I'm just an every day normal stay-at-home mum who was once wrapped up in a religion that was chosen for her by someone else!

It would make SO many people much happier were I in the gutter, drunk or drugged up to the eyeballs 24/7 ..... or stuck in prison for something so that the jdubs could crow over how dangerous it is to leave the fold so 'close to the end' ........... but alas ... I'm perfectly normal! How annoying I must be to some of my former jdub friends and family members eh!

Great thread Sharon!

"... Don't let inherited or programmed fear and guilt drag you down
... life is for living not being afraid to live ...
so celebrate your freedom!"




Last Edited By: AndriaSyxx Mar 1 12 1:10 AM. Edited 1 times.