Hey Rusty, it sure sounds like you are seething with resentment and anger because your expectations aren't being met.

Did you know that some groups won't let anyone speak until they have 90 days? The theory is that up until that time they don't really have anything to share about how to work the program. If you had to speak tonight, which of the 12 Steps do you know enough to talk about? Which of your defects of character has been removed, and how did that happen? What service have you offered to the group? How many newcomers have you helped? What exactly do you have to share--First Person Singular--that would be encouraging to those around you? When you've got those together then you'll be ready to speak. Given your attitude today it sounds like you could benefit from hearing how others have overcome the same problems you're experiencing.

Like they say, "take the cork out of the bottle and put it in your mouth."

When your life shows that the steps work people will line up to hear what you have to say. (Somebody listening to you tell your story will be thinking about you the same thing I once thought of Archie J. "Hey, if it worked for him, it can work for me".)

The point is, Rusty, we don't talk to get shit off our shoulders and on to yours, we share our experience, strength and hope to help others--not ourselves. (It is in helping others that we are helped.)

Here's another help [straight out of the Big Book] When we talk was tell "in a general way" (no public confessions, please)
1. What it was like;
2. What happened, and
3. What it's like now.

From reading what you've posted it looks like you're still in the "what it was like stage". Give yourself the time to recognize the "what happened" stage and live at least a little while the "what it's like now" [That means changed from the way you were when you were drinking and drugging.]

The meeting you've been going to is not the only meeting in your area. Go somewhere else. You're a free man you can choose where ever you want to go. Don't stay stuck in a place to don't like just because they gave you a couple of plastic poker chips. Life is too good to waste even an hour with people who don't accept you as you are.

Hugs, Cee Cee